Missing You

Author: Meg Cabot
Published: January 2007
Letter Grade: B-

Finally, a non-A worthy book. I've been starting to think I'm getting too easy.

Granted, a "B-" isn't exactly a failing grade, but still.

Anyway. This is the last book in Cabot's 1800 Where Are You? series, which she started under the penname Jenny Carroll. (Now all her books are under Meg Cabot, though I have the first four before this one in the old publication.)

It's been awhile since I read the book before this, since it's been a few years (Cabot having only written it because we the fans demanded it :)) so I had to refamiliarize myself a bit with who non-main characters were. I had quite a lot of "Oh, yeah, I remember him/her!" moments.

The series is about Jess Mastriani, a girl who got struck by lightning on her way home from school one day, and it gave her psychic powers, so she could find missing people (in her sleep, don't you know.) It sounds much more corny then it is when I try to explain it, I'm afraid.

At any rate, Jess also has a boyfriend, Rob, who has been rather leery of their, as Jess puts it, "Whatever we were," because he's eighteen, on parole for an unspecified crime, and Jess is still underage. Or is for the first four books of the series, anyway.

By the time "Missing You" rolls around, though, Jess has come of age, gone to Afghanistan to put her powers to use finding terrorists there during the war, lost her powers from being overworked, come home to find Rob smooching a girl with boobs as big as Jess's head, and they take a... break from "whatever we were." And then Jess discovers she's been accepted to Julliard, and it's off to NYC with best bud Ruth (Columbia bound) for music-ing and night terror-ing, and... well, not much else from what I understand.

It really does remind me of a fanfic in places. This from the author who likes to discourage that sort of thing. (mini-rant: Like no one can tell the difference between a fan writer and the real author. Puh-lease. Give us some credit, Meg.)

So, yes. A year passes, and Rob arrives on Jess's doorstep, asking her to find his new-found half-sister who has gone missing. Trips home ensue, along with the discovery of an amateur teenage porno ring type deal.

All right, my synopsis doesn't make it sound too exciting, but I'll put it this way: it kept me entertained, it was nice to a character I've known for so long grow up a little bit, and while most of it was pretty predictable (Hello? The whole thing with Douglas and the school? Yeah, picked that one up right away, thanks) there were a couple things here and there that surprised me. Like the near-ending with Rob and Jess got an "Oh, my God" reaction from me.

But... all right, here's my beef:

Everything moved too quickly. It was like Cabot was trying to tie up one thing before moving on to the next, because God forbid there be two subplots happening at the same time. She found the sister to quickly. She got the whole porno thing out of the way too quickly. I got through it and went "What the hell are they going to do for the next 70 pages?" The romance part was all right. A bit strange, and in my opinion, out of character, like maybe Cabot had been away from her characters for too long and was starting to forget what they should act like, but it was good enough to pass. The conflict with Jess's mother could've gone somewhere, but she just sort of let it die, with a few half-assed moments.

And then, Lord Almighty, the ending.

What the devil was that?

Obligatory cheesy last lines aside. The whole thing with Dr. Krantz. WTF? He came all the way from Washington, D.C., to say all THAT? I would've just called. Save myself some air fare. Call on Saturday or something and avoid the cell phone charges. Not worth it to go all that way just for a cheesy-ass conversation.

And don't get me started on Karen Sue Hankey. First, I'm dying to make fun of the name, but will restrain myself. I don't care how happy Jess was at the end, who would want to spend any time at all with KAREN SUE HANKEY? Especially if the person's name is Jess Mastriani.

And the return of Boobs-as-big-as-my-head-Girl (Yes, she's called that, but that isn't unusual. Just funny) was not exactly what we'd call surprising.

Now you should be wondering why the book got a B-. It started as a B+. But... well. There's no denying I did, to some extent, enjoy the book. Cheesy pointlessness aside.

That, and I still think the stuff Cabot started as "Jenny Carroll" is far better than say... The Princess Diaries. And this deserves some acknowledgement.